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Dentist tries to quiet nagging ex-wife by pulling all her teeth!

A playboy dentist who wanted some relief from his ex-wife’s phone calls tried to make it impossible for her to talk by pulling every tooth in her head — but he just made problems worse.

“I just wanted her to leave me alone so I could live my life,” explains Dr. Maynard Stantigo, 41. “But now she’s bugging me more than ever.”

Juanita Stantigo, 39, is suing her ex-husband for everything he owns, and she still continues to call him on the phone, sometimes as much as ten times a day.

“She won’t leave me alone. She calls all the time. If I have company over, she calls every five minutes. If I’m not at home, she leaves message after message on my answering machine. She’s driving me crazy.”

Dr. Stantigo carried out the dirty trick with precision planning.

“I invited her over for dinner,” says the clever dentist. “She is so attached to me that she was glad to come. She never wanted a divorce anyway — which is the whole problem.

“Then I got her drunk and drugged her. While she was asleep, I pulled all her teeth. You’d think that would solve the problem, that she’d get the message, but she didn’t.

“I know that was a wrong thing to do, but she was causing me to lose my mind. I want to get on with my life and date some other women. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life wrapped-up with her, talking about what went wrong in our marriage and how we could make it work again.”

Dr. Stantigo says that sex was the main problem in the marriage.

“I have a need for a lot of sex,” says the good doctor from Yarumal, Columbia. “I have a powerful sex drive, and she has almost none. It wasn’t fair to her when I ran around on her all the time. I thought that divorce was the honest thing to do. Now I’ve got my freedom, without hurting her. She should have done something about her sexual problems if she was so concerned about our marriage,” he says.

Even without a single tooth in her head, Mrs. Stantigo continued calling her husband, who she claims she can’t live without. The first thing she did when she woke up without any teeth was call her husband and mumble to him about it.

“He may have pulled my teeth, but he didn’t pull out my voice box,” she says. “I could still make noise into the phone.”

Mrs. Stantigo has since gotten a full set of false teeth put in her mouth, and she continues to call her husband on a regular basis.

“I’m suing him for damages, and believe me, it’s enough to put him in the poor house for the rest of his life. But I’m willing to drop the whole thing if he will marry me again,” says the persistent ex-wife.

“In my family,” she says, “’till death do us part’ means just that.”

From Confessions of a Tabloid Writer!

3 comments to Dentist tries to quiet nagging ex-wife by pulling all her teeth!

  • Excellent article !! I am in the process of writing a blog entry on dentists and I hope to use some of the info here.

  • It sounds hard to believe but a local dentist did something even worse and may have gotten away with it. The story I was told was he took his wife fishing, and she went overboard. While they did not have enough evidence for the crime, a few years later he killed a passenger in a drunk driving incident. Finally the idiot may go to jail.

    The dental profession does have it’s share…

  • Forgot to mention the book ‘Confessions of a Former Cosmetic Dentist’…if you enjoy weird dentist stuff.

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