Priest Sexually Molested by Class!

A Catholic priest has left the priesthood and become a truck driver after being sexually molested by an all-girl high school cataclysm class.

Father Enricho Pazzaro says that in all his years as a celibate clergyman, he never laid a sexual hand on anyone, child or adult.

“But they’ve never been able to keep their hands off of me,” says Pazzaro, 34, of Milano, Italy.

“It must be my personality, or my looks — something. I really don’t know what it is. I just know that I’ve been committed to the church, and to remaining celibate, but the women in my parish have not made my job easy.”

It is odd that Pazzaro left the priesthood as a victim of sexual molestation. Many priests have recently been caught with the opposite problem. They are being fired and convicted for sexually molesting boys and girls themselves.

“It started as soon as I got out of the seminary and got my own parish,” Pazzaro says. “I’ve had women leap through the confessional curtain and start kissing me.

“I’ve had them come in my office to talk, and suddenly take off their shirts. They’ve tried to tempt me in every way imaginable. I’ve had it. I’m through.”

The high school girl’s cataclysm class was the last straw for the priest. The ten girls ganged-up on him and overpowered him, literally kidnapping him and making love to him for several hours. At first, the shocked Pazzaro began thrashing his arms and legs, trying to get loose and get out. Then, realizing that he could hurt one of the girls, the kind-hearted priest gave in and did as he was told.

The girls forced him to have sex with all of them, three at a time, and they threatened to lie and say that he was a child molester if he said anything about it to their parents.

Pazzaro then decided to go public and drop out of the church for good.

“It’s not worth putting up with this kind of nonsense,” he says. “That’s not the reason I became a priest.”

His supervisor, Bishop Delanzia Stitarini, is sorry to lose his star priest, but agrees with the decision.

“Father Enricho is a wonderful man, a good counselor, and a fine priest,” Stitarini says. “His services are beautiful.

“But he is too good-looking for the priesthood. Women can’t stop looking at him, and he is a good listener. After spending time with him, with all of that eye contact, some of them become physically aggressive. They can’t help it.”

“He’s better off this way,” Bishop Stitarini says of the six foot four inch priest who many say has the body of Sylvester Stallone and the looks of William Hurt.

“He’ll be able to pick any woman he wants for a wife, settle down, and start a family.”

Father Pazzaro has already secured a job as a truck driver, an occupation for which he’s always held a wild fascination.

“I don’t know what it is about trucks,” says the irresistibly handsome priest. “It’s the power, the size of the machine, and the sound. I’ve always liked to travel, and I like to drive. It’s really the logical next step for me.”

From Confessions of a Tabloid Writer!