Declaring this past week “an emergency,” conservative think tank thinkers have canceled July 4th vacations so they can use the time to come up with new ideas for the future of our country.
“We lost same-sex marriage, health care, and the rebel flag — all in one week,” said the head of RTTCTOA.
“And Obama looks a lot less Muslim now, after he sang Amazing Grace from the pulpit of a Christian church.
“It’s time to regroup. We have plenty of money with which to spread our ideas, but we need some new ideas to spread.”
Some of the ideas under development are
– Making Hillary Clinton look like a murderer
– Making Hillary Clinton look like a thief
– Making Hillary Clinton look like she’s brain damaged
– Making Hillary Clinton look old
“All of these ideas have potential, but they are underdeveloped. We need a comprehensive strategy, clear talking points, and a few rehearsals before we launch.
“It takes time to convert an idea into the truth. That’s why we’re working over the fourth.”
- our freezer door
Our refrigerator started dying. Gradually. I vacuumed its backside and that didn’t help.
A week passed between the time we noticed the machine’s diminishing performance and the time the repairman arrived. By then, the things on the inside were very close in temperature to things on the outside.
The gentleman who did the repair thinks it may have incurred some lightening damage. We’ve had quite a few electrical storms here in NC in July.
He fixed it. It cost a bit. Not nearly as much as a new one — and he said this twelve year old model will probably be around longer than a new one would have. The newer models — with all the great new features — only last six to ten years.
He worked on it for about two hours. He pulled it out, threw hot water, melted ice, changed parts.
But the pictures on the front of the freezer — eye level — never budged.
It occurred to me that they haven’t budged for quite a while. I think almost every photo has been there for ten years.
Aaron is a teenager. Emma is a baby. Clinton is President.
Napoleon Dynamite (2004 — possibly the most recent entry) is still sideways.
Why isn’t Sarah on there?
The door of my mother’s fridge also serves as a time capsule. It’s bigger, with more pictures — and they’ve been there even longer.
Amazing — as many times as I open that door each day. Those are some pretty solid magnets.
I guess the space on the front of a fridge is finite. First come, first serve.
Then it’s frozen solid — like the stuff inside.