a really big egg

On Facebook, I posted a picture of myself holding this big egg — and Dennis Harris noticed that I was holding the big one closer to the camera, thus creating an optical illusion of bigness. He’s right. I did do that. Dennis estimates the larger egg is 1.5 times bigger than the other egg. I think it’s twice as big, or possibly three times bigger.

In any case, it’s a big egg. Below, you’ll see the picture that’s on Facebook along with another picture. This is also an optical illusion. The larger egg is closer to the camera again — because it’s so damn big!

You might also say that when I look to the east, my nose is closer to the ocean than my eyeballs, since — being a nose — it protrudes. You might say that the hood of my car is closer to where I’m going than the steering wheel.

I still don’t know if this is a triple or double yolk.

It’s waiting its turn. I’m thinking… cheese omelet.

big egg

proud enough to take a picture

Each summer, when the Salisbury Post publishes “The Garden Game” series, I admire the produce and quietly snicker.

I’m standing in judgment, not actually assessing those who think they’re such hot stuff because they can grow an unbelievably large tomato — but certainly judging those who have so much time on their hands that they would make a trip to town in order to have their pictures taken with said fruit.

So what does it say about a man who would brag about the size of an egg laid by his chicken.

I am here to do that.

My chickens have been laying some whoppers.

Really big ones. Double yokers. Fairly consistently.

It’s gotta hurt.

And I’m so proud that I took this picture.